When Mariah Met Brian
How a worship leader and sound tech got together
By Mariah Hlatywayo
Photo by Spencer Mathew
To begin my story, I must take you back to January 2015. I'm a broke 22-year-old music student looking for part time work, growing increasingly disheartened by rejection letters and having to say no to teaching positions too far to travel to by bus each week. The tip of the iceberg finally arrives as one of the drawers for my secondhand dresser starts to give way. My frustration grows as I try to force the front piece of the worn-out drawer back into place and I start crying—nothing is going my way and it is all so unfair!
My mum suddenly marches into my room, points her finger at me and says, “Now you listen to me, all of this is happening because one day you told Jesus, thy will be done… And you meant it!”
There is a moment of silence as I think about what she had just said. Then the front of the drawer falls off.
With no job prospects, I focus my energy on something else important—leading worship with the rest of the youth at the Sunday service for the first time. I decide to try to fast and pray because, as a new Christian I hope that this will fill me with the Holy Spirit to such an overwhelming degree that members of the congregation will fall over as I lead worship. I will realise much later that this is a terrible motive for fasting and prayer, but at the time I’m young, immature and a drama queen.
God did indeed have something significant planned for me that Sunday morning, but it didn’t involve a single person falling over.
There I was in between service number one and two, pacing anxiously—the first service had gone well, but now I would have to do it again. The new guy from the sound team, Brian, comes up to me and asks for my wireless mic because he needs to change the batteries. He compliments me on my singing.
I say thanks and admit to being nervous.
“You didn’t sound nervous—I was wondering if I could get your number, so I can call you sometime to get to know you better?”
Wait… what?
It’s time to go on stage again, but I haven’t had time to process, so I just stare at him blankly, say “Sure..” and try to recompose before opening in prayer.
“Dear God...” I begin, struggling to focus, while also wondering why Brian wanted my number. Was he interested in me?
“...Thank you for this morning.”
… But he’d never indicated that he liked me before—did he want drum lessons? Is that why he wanted my number?
“Um, and also, we thank you...”
No, that can’t be it—he asked to get to know me better!
“Um… amen.”
I continue to wonder what Brian could have meant, and why he wanted my number on the car ride home. I turn to my brother, Josh, and ask him what it means when someone asks for my number.
“Boy or girl?”
“That doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does!”
We don’t say anything else to each other for the remainder of the drive home.
I finally cave and confess that Brian had asked for my number on the way back to church for the evening service. To my surprise, my Dad tells me to take Brian seriously. “Brian’s not the sort of person who is after a good time, he has probably put a lot of thought into it before asking you and is genuinely interested in you.”
We arrive at church, but since I don’t know what to do about the Brian situation, I avoid him all throughout the evening service.
I have plenty of time to pray about Brian throughout the following week, being the summer holidays. As a new Christian, I’d had success hearing very clearly from God after fasting and praying, so I decide to give that a go again, believing God would give me an answer on what to do next. As always, God comes through. Just as I am about to fall asleep, I hear a gentle voice saying “Why don’t you give My way a try? I think you might like it.”
My parents brought me up to date and to marry, and marriage was for life. It was also important to me that I didn’t lead Brian on. At the same time, dating to marry someone I barely knew at twenty-two seemed too intense and scary to someone who was happily single, and had been expecting to stay single until her forties. During my week of fasting, I spent a lot of time reading about what the Bible had to say about marriage, and what a godly husband and wife looked like.
I tried to visualise marrying Brian, living with him, and even raising children together, and tried to come to terms with the fact that all of these life-changing events could be happening to me a lot sooner than I had personally planned.
On the Wednesday of that week, I finally felt God give me peace about Brian as I sang along to “How great is our God” with my family at a worship meeting. I decided that I would indeed give Brian my number and get to know him better too.
Brian and I spent the next month or so texting and talking, and were official by Valentine’s day. We got engaged in November and married in July of the following year.
I heard someone once say that God doesn’t give you what you want, He gives you what you need in a spouse. And that has certainly been the case with Brian. He has helped me to grow so much closer to God and always pushes me to grow as a person. He continues to love me and is very gracious and patient with me—even when I don’t think I deserve it. Without his support, I doubt I would have ever been able to write and release my own music, which has always been my dream. He’s the type of husband who would drive my car to a petrol station with a bandaged hand to fill it up with gas, just so that I have enough fuel to get to and from a gig. This year we will celebrate nine years of marriage. As happy as these eight have been, I know that the best is still to come.
Because that’s how good God is.
Mariah - Regular Contributor
Mariah Hlatywayo (lutch-why-oh) is a singer-songwriter and drummer from Perth, Western Australia. She grew up in a musical family and enjoys writing, singing and playing songs inspired by her Christian faith and life experiences. When she is not making music, you can find her teaching music to teenagers, drinking coffee, and annoying Felicity – her fluffy rag-doll cat. Find more at mariahhlatywayo.com