Finding and Maintaining What We are Promised

How do you maintain your luminous colour amidst loss and grief?

I’ve been asking myself this lately. I’m not sure I have the answer, but it inspires me to keep looking for the colour. I’m learning that joy and sadness can coexist. Someone I admire once said “there’s a holiness to the sadness.” This is so true. The more I allow myself to be sad with God the more I know and understand the heart of God. I’m reminded of what Jesus said many moons ago, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). When we mourn we’ll be comforted by God. What a beautiful promise.

Although I do question; what happens when it feels like the colour has left and it can’t be found again? How do we live the life we’re called to live, “a life to the full” (John 10:10) - when we face pain and suffering? Around two years ago, I received a life changing diagnosis. My perspective on my new normal fluctuates. Some days I feel acceptance, hope, on top of my recovery program and the symptoms are improving. Other days I feel helpless, isolated, and deeply sad.